Looking for a plunger (or is it a piston?)

(Best to read Jackie’s post below, first.)
No kidding, when I use the dictionary on my phone, it gives a definition that equates plunger to a piston. Before today, I never equated the lowly home repair tool to the integral part of the internal combustion engine, but when you think about it, they are rather similar in function. Anyway…

I got a panic email from Jackie with the subject line telling me that there was “a mess at the house --- call asap”. So, I called. And before we got off the phone I was headed out of my office to locate the simplest (so I thought) of tools to fix the minor clog in the bathroom.

I asked to go to the Carrefour (jia le fu, in pinyin which means something like happy home). It seems that the “Happy Home” must not require plungers, since more than one attendant replied mei you (don’t have). Of course, I wasn’t sure if they thought I was looking for a piston to work on my car in my dress slacks and shirt…

Through a rather animated explanation that the cesou (toilet) zusule (clogged) and pumping my arm up and down as if plunging an imaginary toilet in front of me, I thought I had got the point across to the driver. However, his ability to spell in pinyin is as bad as my ability to spell in English, so we were in real trouble for me to cross check his definition.

So, strike one on the plunger at Carrefour. We then proceeded to the B&Q which is a nice Home Depot knock off. My driver asked at the door, used the same hand motions I used with him, and the greeter shot me a sly grin and then pointed us to the back corner. (I can only guess what he was thinking!)

We were on the right track this time as we passed a lot of PVG drain pipe and values, but alas, no plunger. We were then directed, again with poor attempt to cover up the humor of it all to my hosts, upstairs. Here I found row upon row of toilets… the thought seriously crossed my mind that I may just have to buy a new one. I could get one for about $40 USD, so what the heck? Maybe toilets are disposable items here?

Strike two for the plunger – at this point I thought finding a piston would be easier.
I ask my driver to call one of his pengyou (friends) to try and find a place where we can locate this household repair tool. On the way to our next place, closer to our home, I had to call my coworker to discuss something. She speaks excellent English, and when I told her of my delima, she asked me to spell what I was looking for (uh oh, I thought – what if I can’t spell it correctly!). I spelled it for her and she said, “is this what you use if your toilet has a problem?” Yes was my prompt reply and I asked her to tell the driver in Chinese what it was I was looking for… “I’m not sure how you say this in Chinese,” she replies…

So to the store my driver thinks will have it. It is a vegetable store very close to my house with several foreigners. My driver asks me to wait as we aren’t exactly parked legally (like I would be able to tell a cop to not ticket me and throw me in jail!) I thought, if there is a plunger in there, then I have to seriously rethink what is in a store from what I can see through the windows.
Within 3 minutes, the driver returns empty handed, and looking rather concerned. Mei you, I say. Mei you he replies.

So, strike three for the plunger – and usually I’d say you’re out, but in China you just keep pressing forward.

My driver puts on his hazard signal (flashers) and slowly backs up the street that we weren’t supposed to be on since it isn’t really a street – it’s just the place for bicyclist to ride so they don’t have to be in the street. Once we get far enough, the flashers come off, and we get back onto the street.

We go to the next intersection and make a turn which puts us directly across from the American School. A man rides by on a bike and my driver exclaims – “Dustin!!!” and points at the man on a bicycle. Low and behold, what does he have – a plunger!!! I remark yes, and know that we are now getting close, as this is the only plunger I have seen since I have been in China, (and I know it is not fashionable to hold one as you ride your bike).

We do a U turn, find a tingche (parking spot) and park the car. I had to go in here since this was a very local place – no laowai (foreigners) here. We walk in, you guessed it, some sort of vegetable market. I would describe it sort of like a permanent, covered, farmers market. While looking at all of the veggies, I realized that plungers typically don’t come from the farm. I notice a store on the right, but my driver presses forward.

Very quickly, the driver must have come to the same conclusion as me, that the farmers didn’t bring plungers (or pistons) to up-sell their customers. We dart into the store, and before I could think about the plunger, I was struck at the prices. My driver raced ahead and sure enough we found a plunger. Not a very good plunger, but nonetheless, it was a plunger.

My total bill, of which the plunger was the most expensive item at 1.62 USD was approximately 3 USD and included some brown sugar, 2.5 liters of coke, and 1 liter of beer… not bad for the two hour saga we had been through.

And so, what lessons have we learned today? First, close all of the doors when the boys go to bed. Second, don’t underestimate your ability to communicate, even if a direct translation doesn’t exist. (I'm having this exact discussion with our marketing consultant.) Lastly, don’t let small things cause you to have a Shanglow day (as it was described to me). And at the same time, don’t let small things cause you to have a Shanghigh day – survival here will be predicated on trying (while very difficult) to keep an even keel through it all.

On to a few other things since I haven’t blogged in a while. The other expats here are great. Everyone is in the same boat, and they all remember what it was like to be new. So helpful, friendly, and concerned that you make the transition OK. The business contacts have also been really nice. This place is incredibly dynamic, and right now at least, I’m enjoying it very much.